@Cinefille

It has been well over a year since I did one of these pointless lists. (I’ll never forget you, Hansel and Gretel.) But 300: Rise of An Empire is a movie worthy of this great honor. If you enjoyed it’s kind-of, sort of but not really 300 (and I did), you’ll probably get a kick out of this movie. If only because Artemisia (Eva Green) makes you question why Themistocles (Sullivan Stapleton) is even there.

1. These trailers are boring. It must be March.
2. 300: With Less Abs and More Facial Hair
3. Fassbender was not in 300 as much as he is in 300: Rise of an Empire.
4. Themistocles is a buzzkill.
5. So. Much. Blood.
6. Artemisia is a fancy Kristen Stewart.
7. Hell hath no fury like an Ancient Greek woman scorned.

Werk it, girl. Werk it, girl.

8. Xerxes is missing some…

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